Eugene and Tom

Last weekend I took a road trip to lovely Eugene, Oregon to visit with some friends (who go to bed WAY too early) and to see a fella’ by the name of Tom Heinl.
I saw him open, quite accidentally, for the Meat Purveyors at the Dour Fir and I spent the whole time laughing at his Johnny Cash with a severely skewed sense of humor take on country music (Jesse, this may be something you want to check out).
He is from Eugene and I randomly saw that he was playing a free show there at a coffee shop. Couple that with me needing to get out of town for a spell and me having two good friends in the same town, and well, I was on the computer booking a bus ticket quicker than you can say “I can’t believe I just stapled my balls/left labia majora to the floor.”
So I went, and was met by friends outside of the bus station (the advent of the iPOD has made even the hell that is Greyhound tolerable). One was scattered and quick with the smiles as usual, and one had started drinking too early (he stopped making sense and fell into an internal babble dialogue that we could kind of hear at a soul food restaurant somewhere in the vicinity of midnight).
So, that night was quick and early (1 AM? My friends are Mormons, I suspect) and the next day E—and I made our way to a charming little place called the Wandering Goat to see Tom Heinl. G—made it, somewhat hungover but sociable.
The place was small and I tanked up on the caffeine while chatting with E—. It was a nice time.
This was going to be an intimate show. A coffee shop, a stage-like platform, Tom wandered in with his guitar, plugged in, and started talking.
Now, this is a funny guy. Not too many people make me laugh outloud, but he can do it. Apparently he hosts a stellar Bingo night on Mondays. He boasted that the next round’s prizes were going to be a mint-condition tube of Linkin’ Logs (“They’ve still got the directions, though I don’t know why you’d need directions”) and some binoculars. It would appear that they also were prone to giving out one of those talking fish plaques out as a prize, but he said that they kept finding it in the bushes at the end of the night, so it was off the list of things to play for.
He launched into his set and we all laughed and had a great time. His cover of Tom T. Hall’s “I Love” is spectacular… though it is more accurate to refer to it as a version rather than a cover as I’m sure Tom T. Hall never mentioned Play-Doh in his nose or “spankins’ that smarts.”
His song “Three Way” makes me cringe every damned time, as it is so fucking obvious that any guy who expresses an interest in trying a three way with his girl would be, more often that not, a little taken aback when she agrees and brings another guy home.
Country music… rarely a happy ending.
I can’t do the man justice here. You should check out his website, then buy his albums (start with “With or Without Me.” It’s genius!).
After the show there was, if I can recall correctly, a nap, a viewing of “Volver” which G— and I didn’t realize was a chick flick, more aptly named “Vulva,” and a great curry dinner. Then there was beer, and Boggle, and people talking in their sleep (“Crusty? Can we do Crusty?”) and a sound sleep.
Thanks G— and E— for your hospitality and thanks to Tom Heinl for being Tom Heinl. If I ever get fired I will be there on Monday for bingo night.